What I always Wanted
by Soului
Summary: Crossover oneshot with Star Trek. Danny's always wanted to be up there, among the stars. But now that he's there, he wonders if it was worth the price. Kind of sad, mostly pointless. But I think it turned out pretty well. Introspective and Immortal Danny.


A/N: So this is just another one of the crazy crossover ideas that come out of my head. I'm thinking that this takes place in 'The Next Generation", mostly because I like that series best, but it could probably be in any of the more recent shows. I always like the idea of Danny being immortal. It makes sense to me, I mean he shares most other ghostly traits, why not immortality? This is meant to be a one-shot. But if enough people like it, I may expand the idea into a series. Anyway, you all know the drill; I own nothing you recognize.

Danny's POV

For as long as I could remember, I wanted to be an astronaut. I was always the kid that spent hours on the roof at night, just looking at the sky, imagining what it would be like up there. What would it be like, looking down on the world? I had seen pictures of course, but they say the actual sight brings grown adults to tears. What would it be like to float, weightless, protected from the cold vacuum of space by only a few feet of metal? I wanted to be up there more than anything in the world. It was my dream. I remember how I used to plaster my walls with pictures of shuttles, I memorized all of NASA's entry requirements; I could name all the planets and their moons off by heart in order of their discovery. I always sucked at math, but I never gave up hope. Like my teachers' always said, 'You can do anything you want to', 'Nothing is impossible'. Even when the whole ghost portal thing happened, I didn't give up hope. No matter how crazy my life got, no matter how many ghosts I had to fight or nights I went without sleep, no matter how many times I sat in Mr. Lancer's detention room because I hadn't done my homework, I never doubted that someday, somehow, I would see those stars up close and personal. Sometimes I think that was the only reason I stayed in school or kept up my human life at all. I mean, it would've been so much easier to be a ghost full time, no dodging parents, no lying to teachers, no detention or homework. But if I were ghost full time, I would never have a chance to live my dream.

Not that I had much of one to begin with with my marks, as Jazz would point out. Oh Jazz, I miss her so much, no matter how much she annoyed me while she was alive. I miss them all. I still visit their graves whenever I get the chance, at least, I visit the place where their graves used to be. It's a park now, time has erased even that little reminder of my past life. It's a nice place, paths and trees and gardens, benches here and there where I can sit and remember how it used to be. The city isn't even called Amity Park anymore, the original town was destroyed a few years into the third world war. I think that was the worst day of my life (or whatever I have). I tried so hard, but there was only so much even a half-ghost could do. There had been two strikes launched that day, one against Amity Park and the other against a much bigger city to the north. I don't even remember the town's name, but it doesn't matter now. I could only stop one and as much as I wanted to protect my home, it would mean many more people would die. I had to do the right thing. The town was rebuilt once the war was over, Phantom City it's called now. I guess I should feel honored, but I don't. Mostly I feel guilty.

I never wanted immortality. I could never understand the fixation with the whole 'fountain of youth' thing. I mean, who wants to live forever? Of all the people in the world to be immortal, why me? I actually recall asking Clockwork that a few centuries ago. I can't remember his answer, it was something cryptic and complicated, as usual. Sometimes I wonder why I bother; I've known him for literally ages, but I can probably count on one hand the number of straight answers he's given me. But at least he's someone to talk to, him and Dora and Frostbite and any number of other ghosts I've made friends with over the years. At least they last more than a few decades.

My fellow Starfleet officers think I'm a heartless jerk ("He makes Vulcans look warm and cuddly," sticks out in my mind). They don't understand, how can they? They don't go day-by-day knowing that they will loose anyone they get close to. They haven't watched spouses grow old and die while they stay young. They won't live forever.

I've often considered moving into the Ghost Zone permanently. As careful as I am, I can't help but get attached to some people, in the Zone I'd never have to deal with that sort of pain again. Don't I deserve a break? I've been protecting and guarding for generations and sometimes I think I've done enough, that the galaxy can get by without me from now on. But then some new crisis will arise that'll require me to stick my hand into the warp core or something (when no one's looking of course). Sam was right; I have a hero complex. No matter how nice it would be to quit, I can't, I'm saving lives. Besides, it's not so bad, Wulf visits me a lot (sometimes he brings Ember or Dora along with him), I have my powers, I have my purpose, and after centuries of dreaming, I have the sky.

I look out the view port of my quarters, watching the stars fly by and thinking about how much Tucker would love this. We have some leave coming up on Earth, maybe I'll replicate an old PDA to leave under that oak tree where his grave used to be. Just for old times sake. A small smile touches my face as my comlink beeps. "Ensign Fenton, you're needed on the bridge."

"On my way." I say, turning to leave my quarters. There's a book on the floor. I put it back on the table on my way out, _The Design and Use of Earth Spacecraft-NASA Early 21__st__ Century_ by Daniel G. Notnef. I've had many names over the last few centuries. That particular book was published in 2260, the year is now 2487.

A/N: AU is a wonderful thing, it's the fanfiction author's best friend. I have no idea what the time frame for Star Trek actually is. I'm sure I could figure it out if I listened more closely to the star-date in the show, but I'm not that ambitious. Anyway, let me know how I did, R&R please! If enough people like it and tell me, I might expand this idea into a series later on. Until next time!


End file.
